Sunday, March 19, 2006

Working through the grief

After four very depressing days, the fog is starting to lift, at least in my head. The weather here has been foggy, grey, and muggy, and does not lift the spirits at all.

The kids are doing fine; they have been much more concerned about their weeping parents than anything. Anna even helped her dad dig Montana's grave - not an easy task in this drought-hardened soil. I did have to tell Anna to stop talking about the "puppy" she decided we were going to get next, and what kind of collar we would buy it. Although we won't be dogless forever, I am not ready to think about another dog yet.

I did have to work on Thursday and Friday this week, but fortunately I do work somewhere that people understand what kind of loss this was. Indeed, my coworkers have had a loss, too; they were attatched to her since she came with me to work everyday since her diagnosis last September. When I got to work on Thursday their were beautiful flowers already on my desk, and later one of my clients sent me cookies from a bakery that delivers them warm from the oven. Since I hadn't eaten anything for a long time, when they arrived I scarfed FOUR of them before sharing with the staff.

I have also been touched by the many comments on my blog. People who knew my Montana in life and on-line have written so many nice things. It helps to know Montana had many fans, and that I share this grief with others.

Leigh-Ann wrote me "to suggest that you put up a link to your preferred animal charity in your blog sidebar, as I'll happily make a donation in Montana's memory. I'd rather send a donation to a place you're supportive of than just some large, faceless national charity." This generosity blew me away, and its taken me a few days to come up with an organization.

Montana was, in all respects, the penultimate Golden Retriever. She was beautiful and sweet until the end. Because she embodied the ideal of the breed, if anyone is inclined to make a donation in her name, please contact Gold Ribbon Rescue, helping Golden Retrievers in Central Texas, by clicking the image below.

I'll write Montana's eulogy when my heart is calmer.


Leigh-Ann said...

See, I knew you'd pick the perfect charity. I made a donation to Gold Ribbon Rescue's "Extraordinary Golden Fund", as it just seemed appropriate. Hopefully they'll be able to help other dogs like Montana find homes, even the ones with difficult medical conditions.

I'd also like to say that I'm impressed that you used the word "penultimate" in a sentence, seriously.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you guys are doing better. Though, I know it will be a long time before your heart is at peace.

We love ya!


Lisa said...

I'm so glad that you have Anna & Colin to help you both through this hard time. It sounds like they have both been very sweetly concerned about you two. I'm also glad that you have such wonderful co-workers who can so deeply understand & share your feelings. We have really been thinking about ya'll alot. It is hard for me to imagine walking into your house without Montana there to welcome us. But her kind and gentle spirit was too big to ever really leave you. You were so lucky to have each other. xoxo

Emily said...

Oh, I'm so glad Leigh-Ann suggested that. That's what I wanted to do, too! And I chose the Extraordinary Golden Fund in memory of Montana, just like she did.
I'm snuggling on Sabrina now and we're sending warm loving thoughts your way.