Sigh

Shortly after Colin was born, I set out to find Anna a preschool, because she was so darned bright and articulate she needed more stimulation that I could give her, and also I wanted to have some time to spend bonding with the new baby. We found her a great Montessori school, which has been wonderful on many levels, but I was surprised by a couple of things.

It seems what Anna needed more than additional verbal stimulation was actually a place to foster her independence. She has really thrived at school, after an initial 6 weeks of bawling and tearing my heart out everytime I left her. Now she has her own little world there to grow and learn and become her own self.

I hardly remember the alone time with Colin that first year Anna was at school. Sure, I remember sitting on the couch with him while he nursed, and planning my day around the 2-nap schedule. And although I immediately bonded with my second baby, the relationship is inherently less narcissistic.

NOW, though, now that Colin is about the age that Anna was when she started her school, now I love my mornings alone with him. After Anna is off to school, we sit down for a leisurely breakfast, then he plays while I do some chores, then we go to the rec center. He loves staying with the lovely German woman in the nursery while I jog and lift weights. When I return, he runs to me with a smiling "Mommy!" and hugs me like I'm his favorite person. Then he tells me he wants to ride the elevator, and we jump down the stairs, counting first in English, then in German or Spanish (his choice). Afterwards, we might go to HEB (our local grocery store), and he acts like its the highlight of his day, mostly because of the free cookies in the deli. We go home and have lunch together, and he generously shares his half-chewed food and makes monster noises, and encourages me to join him. If I stick out my tongue at him, he shrieks with laughter, touches my tongue, and says, "Again, Mommy," at least 20 times.

Today after lunch, we went outside and fed the chickens some leftover rice, then he sprayed the garden with water until I suggested the swing. Then we did the swing until his little heart was content, which was just about time to go pick up Anna and then take a nap.

And it's great because when Anna comes home, she has me all to herself. Today, she and I took a shower, delivered neighborhood newsletters to our block, then watched "The Young Black Stallion."

Anthony had a meeting tonight, and Colin gave him such an enthusiastic hug and kiss. Anth said, "I'm going to miss this when we are no longer the people they most want to spend time with." Anna was tired and I put her down first, then read books to Colin. He spent a long time revisiting the pages after the story was finished, discussing the symbolism in the pictures. He was so relaxed and snuggly, and smelled like vanilla and cinnamon. (sigh) Do they really have to grow up?